Letters Archive
Week Ending September 12, 1998

Dear Tasuki,

      No Tasuki! You are alot of peoples hero! forget Tanahome ok! To me you are the hero of the show. I mean who protected Miaka when she was being attacked by Tamahome, who gave Miaka mouth to mouth, Who comes to the rescue alot of the time! well YOU do! So you are a hero!!!! and don't let anyone tell you any diffrent! Think of it this way, when someone offends you, just say to yourself or to them, that there just jealous of your fangs, and how masculine they make you look! No matter what people say you will always be a hero to me.

      I sound really weird mentioning my dog. I don't hear him talk to me or anything, I have people friends! I just don't want you to think my screws are loose or anything. because no there in very tight. I just think my dog being alot like YOU! is funny, thats all.

      No, I'm afraid the bugs don't get blown up. There are things out there that most likely would blow them up. So don't lose all hope!

      Hey Tasuki! I'm there for you man(gives Tasuki a pat on the back) I heard that on a movie once and I've always wanted to say it, but seriously heres a bottle of sake, and if you ever need to talk just yell.

Evon

P.S. It's really Avon, but I just made a typing error the first time I wrote in so that's why I have been signing Evon.

Dear Evon/Avon,

      Thanks fer the words of encouragement! It's certainly nice to be appreciated. An' thanks fer the sake, too. It was great!

Tasuki

Dear Nuriko,

      Hey you're calling ME a coward! I recall you runing out on me when I was in trouble with her! What goes around comes around. Sure it would be great if she joined our party, I think. Popcorn anyone? Hey Nuriko what movies do you got there? Wandering Mage Chichiri what did you order on the pizza? Did they say when it was going to be here I'm starved and I don't think this popcorns going to fill the void.

Miaka

Dear Miaka,

      Movies, movies... oh, yes, here they are! "Master Fong Sai-Yuk", "Lone Wolf and Cub, Baby Carriage to Hades", "Hardboiled" (Chow Yun Fat is so cool!), and all the Jackie Chan flicks!!! I think she got a small veggie pizza for herself & an extra large with the works for us to share. They should be here soon.

Nuriko

Dear Tasuki,

      Gomen nasai that you do not feel like drinking anymore, maybe after the ice cream and the bookstore you will feel better. If you are lactose intolerant, it would mean that you can not digest dairy products. Glastig-san described it to me as gastroenterosis. If we need to, we can go into greater detail at the bookstore. Unfortunately, Glastig-san has grown very inpatient at all the delays, perhaps that had something to do with her behavior. She has already set out for my temple, and maybe we will see her later if you do not mind. She is always very well behaved at my temple, and gets along well with my servants, so everything should be in order apon our arrival. Ah, look, there is the ice cream parlor, are you willing to try some?

Yuryoku na Miko

Dear Yuryoku na Miko,

      Sure, I'll try it! If I don't like the taste I'll just clear my mouth out wit' sake! Do they have sake flavored ice cream?

Tasuki

Dear Nuriko,

      Can you give Tomo a makeover? Too much makeup = Overkill........

HRH Chibird

Dear HRH Chibird,

      I'd love to, but I don't think there is big enough face scraper and that much makeup remover in all of Konan and Koutou combined!!

Nuriko

Dear Tamahome,

      (Miaka, Wandering Mage Chichiri and Kourin sneak past Tamahome) Oh Tamahome! Gomennasai for hitting you in the face! What? Where are we going? Oh we're just off to get some more popcorn, and getting away from Black Jade! Nuriko attacked her with a pillow thinking it was you! We didn't want to stay sooo here we are.

Miaka

Dear Miaka,

      And why would Nuriko want to hit me in the face with a pillow? No, don't tell me, I really don't want to know. I think I saw Nuriko and Black Jade walking together and chatting like old friends. You know, Black Jade can be nice, if she wants to be.

Tamahome

Dear Tasuki,

      Why, helo, fellow bandit, who uses some kind of FAN! I use a dessed! Its a magical worm, and when I wave it at someone, it crawls over to them and bites them! Yep, the magical worm,Moro-Moro!

Leader of the Sendu Bandits!

Dear Leader of the Sendu Bandits,

      Heeeyyyy, that's greeeaaattt... Did ya' find yer worm at the bottom of a bottle of mescal? And if ya' did, did ya' eat it???

Tasuki

Dear Nuriko,

      Aahh Nuriko, do you think this is such a good idea??? I mean what if someone else comes through the door? Whatever you say. Hey we need your help whats taking so long! (door opens and Nuriko wacks at the person) aaahh Nuriko, that is NOT Tamahome...... It's BLACK JADE!!! Hey Wandering Mage Chichiri, Kourin what do you say we go get some more popcorn...now!

Miaka

Dear Miaka,

      Gomennasai Black Jade I did not see you standing there! I was looking for Tamahome-kun. I hope I did not hurt you. Miaka!! Minna!!! You cowards, get back here!! Perhaps Black Jade would like to join our little party...

Nuriko

Dear Tamahome,

      Why am I a blacksheep? And why does Nakago keep chi-blasting my feather dusters? How come my MAths teacher, Mrs Hough, ended up as Taaitsu-kun and still manages to give us homework? Oh...yeah and why did Nakago kiss you?

Empress Chibird...Queen of Chi-land...Kick Ass....

Dear Empress Chibird,

      I don't know what you are talking about. You sound a bit incoherent, you aren't feverish are you? As to your last question, I would have to say Nakago kissed me because he is a hentai freak of nature.

Tamahome

Dear Tasuki,

      A sign of masculinity? *raises eyebrow* OK....whatever you say, I'll just be walking this way now.

      Oh whatever my dog being alot like you, you being alot like my dog, no biggie! He watches the T.v when I watch your show, so mabey you are him and his little doggy friends idol? Must be the fangs, they must admire you because your just so....masculin. Yes thats it. Masculin, uh huh. well I'll mabey see ya at a bar sometime, bye!

      Oh a bug bomb is a thing, that let's out this smell, that kills the bugs. (I think thats how it works) I know It's not something that would blow up your house or anything, so it's not that violent. Sorry to disapiont you.

Evon

Dear Evon,

      So the bugs don't explode? That's disappointing. Glad you and your dog enjoy our adventures. At least I'm someone's hero.

Tasuki

Dear Chichiri,

      Is that thing on your head a tessen? And if you say Lekka Shien will your hair catch on fire? jUST ASKING....

HRH Empress Chibird

Dear HRH Empress Chibird,

      Ahhh, no that "thing" as you call it on my head is my hair, no da. Tasuki has the tessen. A tessen is a metal fan. Now, if he shouts Lekka Shien and aims it at me, he would most likely set my hair on fire. But let's not give him any ideas, ne no da.

Chichiri

Dear Nuriko,

      (attacks Miaka with pillows) EEEEEHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! NO FAIR!!!!!!!! look! look !look ! LOOK what you did! (points to popcorn spilled all over the ground) sniff sniff, all that wonderful tasty popcorn waisted! Well it just so happens that I'm a champion at pillow fighting! I must defend the honor of my beloved popcorn!!! (starts pillow fight) Nuriko no fair you're stronger than all of us! Hey Wandering Mage Chihiri, Kourin! what do you say to a little game of team up on Nuriko! (Nuriko jumps out of the way at the last minute, and Tamahome who was just going to see what was going on opens door, and gets a pillow right in the face)He he he he.... Gomennasai Tamahome(shuts door as fast as she can) (bursts of laughter) NURIKO! that was all your fault!......

Miaka

Dear Miaka,

      Hee-hee... Hai!! Let's do that again!! Ok ladies, does everyone have a pillow? Good. Oh Tamamhome... we neeeeeedddd yooouuuuu... come here please... heeheeeheee

Nuriko

Dear Tasuki,

      Well.... I know some people who would beg to differ. It's more like the barmaids are a little on the odd side. Your fangs are cute Tasuki. It's just that girls from my world aren't used to seeing people with fangs. You see there are some myths in my world about blood sucking guys with fangs called vampires. That's why they were afraid of your fangs, not because girls from my world are weird.

      You being alot like my dog isn't a bad thing....He's smart for a dog. Not to mention cute. So don't feel insulted.

Evon

Dear Evon,

      Oh, that's why she was lookin' at me funny! Alot of guys have'em where I come from. They're a sign of masculinity. An' well, they're just &*^%$#@ cool!! Tell ya' what, I won't be insulted about yer dog if instead of sayin' I'm alot like him, ya' say he's alot like me.

Tasuki

Dear Chichiri,

      Oh that's alright Chichiri. I know that's not what you hoped would happen. Gomennasai if you felt like I was saying that it was your fault, because I don't think that. My mom can be that way sometimes. I think she was just surprised, and mabey a little hurt, and that was her way of coping with it. So don't worry. ^-^

Kiwi

Dear Kiwi,

      I do hope that at least the two of you are now talking to each other about what is happening, and how you feel, no da. If you need a friend to write to, please feel free to write to me, ne no da.

Take care,

Chichiri

Dear Suzaku Seishi,

      Hey! minna! I made a new friend today. She's got a younger sister called Cathren (that's how she spells it) but she likes to draw you guys. She showed me some of her pictures, and I think there really really good. They look just like you! she did a really good one of Nuriko. It's my personal favorite. I'll have to show you it, once I get a chance to scan it. I'm going to put all of them up on my page (It will be up soon, hopefully by next week) She can draw Tasuki really well too!

Miaka

Dear Miaka,

      Cool! Let us know what the URL of your webpage is so we can visit you there. We look forward to seeing your friend's artwork.

Nuriko

Dear Tasuki,

      NO! I'm not stupid! I wasn't asking you if you bite. I was asking if you actually tried to use that as a pick up line. If you did you have to learn some new pick up lines!

      I took your advice and killed the eight legged buggers( as you would put it) They just keep coming back! I already tried a bug bom, and worked for a week. It's just I live in an old house.

      You know what! I think you and my dog have the same personalities! Really I'm serious. I'm not calling you a dog or anything. He loves to be praised, but hates affection. He ignores all girl dogs the best he can. Instead of a fan he has a chew rope, and whenever you try to give him a hug, he picks it up in his mouth, and starts whipping it around. Last but not least even though he acts tough, underneath all those prickels he's a real softy. Oh and he hates it when people are giving another dog all the attention!

Evon

P.S. Now his nick name is Tasuki!

Dear Evon,

      Hmmmmm... Thanks, I think. Hell I've been compared to worse. An' yes that is what I was tellin' her in that picture, cos' she looked scared of my fangs. Don't know why... th' barmaids here seem to think they're cute. Women in yer world are strange.

Tasuki

Dear Nuriko,

      Consider the popcorn popped!~ runs to get popcorn, then runs back to room~ Hey guys! popcorns ready! Guys...... (looks around room and finds all the pillows are missing, and Nuriko, Wandering Mage Chichiri and Kourin also gone) Hhhhmmm...*hears someone behind her* wait a minute....

Miaka

Dear Miaka,

      Shhhhh... ^_~

Nuriko

Dear Chichiri,

      Arigato! for your advice, I really apreciate it. I hope your finger feels better soon! I'm afraid my mom took my letter I wrote to you the wrong way. She thinks I was being disrespectful to her, but thanks for listening. For now on I'm only going to write happy letters. Gomen I don't want to burden you with my problems. I'm sure you have some of your own ^-^. Oh yeah was the crab ok? I don't like hurting animals, but it was the only way to get it off your finger.

Kiwi

Dear Kiwi,

      Gomen that your mother felt that you were being disrespectful to her, no da. That was not my intention! I do hope that at least the channels of communication have opened up for the two of you and that you can talk to each other about what is going on and how you feel. That is what is important, ne no da. The crab and my finger are both fine, no da. Thank you for asking!

Chichiri

Dear Tasuki,

      Since you will be in my company you do not have to worry about koi ponds or Lady Dumpling. Yes Tasuki, ice cream is dairy. Are you lactose intolerant? Don't worry we will not force you to eat any if you really don't want to. You shouldn't be afraid to try new things though. Besides you are in good company. I will not allow kowaii hentai females anywhere near my temple

Yuryoku na Miko

Dear Yuryoku na Miko,

      If ya' don't let the kowaii females into yer temple, how did The Glastig get in there? Well, OK she ain't too kowaii, but she can't be too bright either... insultin' the Emperor is one big *&^%$#@ serious offense!! I can't &^%$#@* believe she did that!! I ain't sure if I'm lactose intolerant (whatever that is) or if I just hate dairy cos' my Ma keeps restin' her breasts on my head when I'm at home. She's a strange one, let me tell ya'! I think I'll be gettin' a different drinkin' partner though. I'm kinda pissed that she's been insultin' my friends. It's just kinda gotten real old, real fast. So, how's about Chiriko an' ya' try to educate me in th' bookstore after th' ice cream? Her treatin' people that I care about like that has put a damper on my drinkin' fer now, maybe I'll fergive her, but not today.

Tasuki

Dear Suzaku Seishi,

      Announcment! Whoever thinks is strongest answer quickly! Actually, he who thinks is strongest, answer before any others do!

Marvelous Melon Man

Dear Marvelous Melon Man,

      Well for sheer physical strength, that would be me! And I sing the best of all the Seishi, too! Hee-hee...

Nuriko

Dear Hotohori,

      I don't think that Black Jade-sama will have much luck teaching Glastig-san how to be lady like. She rarely behaves herself except at my temple. She doesn't drink much there either!! I know that she has some less than reedeeming qualities, but they are a part of her and it is never a good idea to try to change someone without their approval. Glastig-san likes herself just the way she is, and we just have to accept that she probably will not change.

      Also, I would have invited you for ice cream but as an emperor you have a country to look after. We will certainly bring you back some ice cream, probably chocolate and french vanilla. They are sophisticated enough for your tastes.

Yuryoku na Miko

Dear Yuryoku na Miko,

      It seems you are quite correct about your friend. She actually had the temerity to call me a "toff and a sexist pig" because I did not find her insulting of Chichiri and his female friends acceptable behaviour for a young lady. We are not happy with her!! Even Tasuki has better sense than to insult the Emperor! However, as she is his friend, he can deal with her as he sees fit. Black Jade wishes her to be beheaded as is the proper punishment for insulting an Emperor. I do not agree, as she is an outsider and is not used to our customs. She was not expected to change, just to behave herself while at the Imperial Palace. Pity she does not take after you, Yuryoku na Miko-sama. Your company is always a pleasure and you will always be welcome at our Court.

      Thank you for your invitation, although you are correct in that I am unable to join you. Your offer to bring back ice cream is very much appreciated and I am certain that whatever flavour you choose it will delicious. Once again, arigato gozeimasu.

Hotohori

Dear Chichiri,

      What`s your chi?

Marvelous Melon Man

Dear Marvelous Melon Man,

      Chi is essentially life energy, no da. All living things possess chi. If what you are asking about is what I use for my spells, that too is my chi, but I had to study for many years (3 of them with Taiitsu-kun) to learn to focus and control it, no da.

Chichiri

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