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Dear Tasuki,
So, I see that at least you have the humility to kiss ass to Hotohori-sama. Good for you. And those were not my disks. Our battles are between us, I suggest that you leave the rest of my clan (and any "cloth slingshots") out of this. I am responcible for the little wars I start, and anyone that I involve, but I am not responcible for the actions against you of anyone you involve. Do try to avoid Leanan-sidhe (who I believe Yuryoku na Miko has informed you of), she will ruin all my fun! If you care to look a bit further in that book of Black Jade loaned Chiriko, you might find her. What they say of her is a bit more truth, though she does not limit herself to poets. Though you did say you like a good brawl... perhaps you would like to deal with a real blood sucker?
Also, I flashed you so fast, how could you even tell? I may, as Yuryoku na Miko says, have low morals, but I am not completely immodest. ::returns to flash talk:: So shut the bloody hell up ya' rabid-inu punk!!!
The Glastig
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Dear Yagi-onnanoko (goat girl),
OI! What's this s--t yer callin' me a rabid punk dog? The name is Genrou! Wolf ya' baka, not dog!! An' ya' showed me quite enough when ya' flashed me, ya' hentai kyuuketsuki! When do ya' wanna get down to it an' brawl? Or would ya' jus' rather go to an inn an' watch me drink yer ass under the table?
Tasuki
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Dear Tamahome,
Oh I'll definitely let you know, so long as I get part of the take.... gotta pay for the woodman to cut these logs you know!
Aidou
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Dear Aidou,
Not a problem! And since I really like your style (not to mention that you can kick Tasuki's ass!), how about a 70/30 split? 70 for me, 30 for you?
Tamahome
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Dear Mitsukake,
Mitsukake, I need your help! Fool that I was I ate some highly questionable food from the Unviersity cafeteria.... and now I feel extremely nauseous.
I feel so ill...
*turns green*
I think I'm going
*regurgitates her previous meal onto Tasuki's log battered feet*
................................................................
*hides behind Mitsukake*
Isn't part of a Dcotor's job to prevent injury or illness?
Prevent him from flambe'ing me...............
Please.....
*starts turning green again*
uh oh......
*sweatdrops*
(Last Time I eat something they say is quiche and isn't recognizable)
Wandering Mage Chichiri
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Dear Wandering Mage Chichiri,
Here is some herbal tea that I brewed for you, please lay down and drink it while I clean up Tasuki and the floor. He will be without his coat for awhile as it must go out to be cleaned. I have already washed, dried, and polished his tessen and explained to him why you did what you did. He seemed to forgive you. But, do understand if he avoids you for awhile. Please stay away from eggs in your cafeteria! I would recommend tea, toast, and clear broth for awhile.
Feel better,
Mitsukake
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Dear Chichiri,
Joy of joys! I have sugar! Now I can make tea! And I really do need it too! Unfortunately, I can't seem to get away from Glastig-san and her Tasuki troubles. To tell the truth, I feel she is being targeted rather harshly. For one thing, Glastig-san really doesn't have goat legs. All though I do like to tease her about it on occasions, it isn't really a nice thing to say. No, she shouldn't have stolen the tessen (bad, bad Glastig-san), but she is extremely "playful" and rather nice once you get to know her. About those hentai disks... those belong to her sister, Leanan-sidhe, not Glastig-san (yes, more irish faeries). I have never met her personally, but I have heard a lot about her. She is extremely kowaii and abunai. Stay far far away from her.
Gomen nasai, and have a cup of tea for this whole mess. I suggest that Glastig-san and Tasuki just get smashed and pass out on the floor. They'll be so drunk, and their hang-overs will be so bad, that they will probably have huge blackouts and forget the whole thing ever happened. This way Mitsukake won't have to use up all his ki healing Tasuki, and I won't have to exaust myself and my attendants by curing Glastig-san.
Yuryoku na Miko
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Dear Yuryoku na Miko,
Arigato for the tea, it was delicious! I agree with your solution, no da. That way no one is seriously hurt. Your friend is almost as violent as Tasuki, no da! Quite kowaii, no da! Chiriko showed me the "Fairies" book that Black Jade had given him so that I could see the definition of a Leanan-sidhe:"Leanan-Sidhe (Lan-awn-shee) On the Isle of Man she is a blood-sucking vampire and in Ireland the muse of poets. Those inspired by her live brilliant, though short, lives." How did you get involved with such a kowaii group of people?
Although you feel that Tasuki is being harsh with your friend, she is antagonizing him, no da. She has even threatened me, no da! My response to her was to let her do what she will with Tasuki, but I did warn her that tessen stealing will not be tolerated and that if he asks for my help I will help him. If you can calm her, I will do my best to calm Tasuki, ne no da.
Chichiri
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Dear Hotohori,
Ah, my best beloved Lord, to hear from you from the Far Realms quite overcomes me with emotion. Thank you for your trust in me, I try every moment to carry on as you would wish. I will, of course, not harm the "crazed hentai chicks"
if that is your will. However, may I not order the Palace Eunuchs to "escort"
them out safely?
Black Jade (A.K.A.) Hotohori no Chuuguu
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Dear Black Jade,
If they are that bothersome you may have them gently escorted out of the Palace. However, why have you not considered creating a second Koukyuu out of these girls? It does seem to be what they want in life, you can control them and the Seishi that wish to perhaps get to know them better, will be able to do so without being molested by them. That sounds like an excellent solution to me.
Hotohori
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Dear Chiriko,
I needed a bit of help on a research project......
I'm looking up stuff on Arthurian legends, and I need to find the Arthurian legend where one of the Knights of the Round Table is turned into a werewolf by his wife, cause he angered his wife in some way. Can you help?
Thanks!
And if you could tutor me in Java, I could use the help ^_^
Wandering Mage Chichiri
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Dear Wandering Mage Chichiri,
Try this for your research:Medieval Sourcebook . It should prove to be quite helpful and was recommended by Black Jade. Unfortunately my duties here prohibit me from tutoring you in Java, gomen.
Chiriko
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Dear Chichiri,
What did he mean "half of it was his'? I only took his bloody tessen. And, um, I really don't think ya' need ta know wha- ......
I just realized... You! I thought holy peoples were above that type of thing. Yer just using me for yer revenge. Instigator! I don't owe ya' that much. And don't compare Baka-flame and me. We are nothin' alike.
(Yuryoku na Miko:"That's a joke."
gggrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr)
I'm kojin (and I don't mean dead) and I have gavity defying hair. Baka-flame just looks like he doesn't know how ta use his friggin' tessen. (If any of ya' says anything about my wisp, I shall have ta harm ye. And what was that about your Aijin? I didn't know monks were allowed to have lovers...)
And now, I ask that ya' stay out of my battles. I will fight or make peace as I please, not as you do.
The Glastig
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Dear The Glastig,
Deal with Tasuki as you wish, no da. I am no instigator, I just relayed to you what his response was to your question. Although I did clean it up quite a bit, no da! I do want to warn you that tessen stealing will not be tolerated again, and as his friend and fellow Seishi I will help him if he asks for it, ne no da. As for Chichiri no Aijin... Eastern monks can and I have nothing more to say on THAT subject, no da.
Chichiri
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Dear Tasuki,
Poor.. Poor...Tasuki-san.Gomennasai, Nuriko told me that you are one sorry seishi. When I wrote to you about the Chichiri incedent, I wasn't aware that everyone else also was writing in giving you a hard time. Now to add to feeling bad for Chichiri, I also feel bad for you. I do belive that the s--t(as you would put it) from everyone is worse! Although I can feel your pain, with that Lady Dumplin thing . I remeber when I was in Elementry school.(ask Chiriko if you don't know what that is)anyway, I remeber this big mother of a kid!!! falling on me from this play structer. I have never felt more pain than that ever since. The impact of the kids body weight almost broke my nose! From that piont on all the kids called him Shamu (name of a famous whale) Again Gomennasai for everything. I hope there's no hard feelings.
Oh, and just for the record you most likely know by now that what you did was wrong, but what Chichiri did wasn't right either. Like my mother always said (and still does) 2 wrongs don't make a right. There is that better^-^ ? I'm sure this Chichiri thing did wonders for ego! (but is it just me or do I say "thing" alot, I think it's a force of habit!)
Also I want you to have this as a peace offering (hands over, not a bottle, not a six pack, but a KEG!, of your one and only, favorite drink, SAKE!) and here take thes as well, you may find this will help you control your temper(hands over punching bag) and this is just and inside joke between me and my hentai friends!(hands over Tamahome blow up doll) For flaming of course! *grin*
Kiwi ^-^
P.S. I'm not the hentai one out of the group! and I wasn't the one who came up with that joke either!
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Dear Kiwi,
Arigato for the sake, punching bag (is it flame proof?), and the Tamahome doll! Although Miaka keeps trying to steal the doll. I don't know why, maybe it has more personality than the real thin' heh-heh... Thanks again!
Tasuki
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Dear Chichiri,
er... um... Chichiri? Modesty forbids that I explain what the cloth sling shot is. Aiyah! Thank the gods that Tasuki doesn't know where I live!! Oh dear... maybe they need therapy (or a room with several large weapons, I don't know). Didi you see what Glastig-san finally wrote back? Yareyare... the verbal abuse never ends. I have to be honest though, all of this internet banter is quite amusing. It's nice to be the mature in the bunch. It's a shame that Tasuki won't tell you what they stole. I guess Glastig-san will just have to use her brain and figure it out herself. I refuse to touch that issue anymore. The "cloth slingshot" just threw me for a loop. I must go and recover from the shock.
Yuryoku na Miko
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Dear Yuryoku na Miko,
Gomen, that you need to recover from Tasuki and your friend, no da. He was just ranting at the computer as he responded to her and gave me quite a headache, no da! Perhaps these two should meet on a battlefield or a room at an inn and just get it over with, ne no da! I think he told her he took some of her computer diskettes and he claims they were QUITE hentai! He even made Chiriko cover his eyes, no da. Something to do with Tamahome-kun and Nakago. I just don't want to know or go there, no da.
Good luck!
Chichiri
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Dear Tasuki,
Nani?! Ya' can't face me yerself?? HA! Now I know why you don't have any scars, ya' run away anytime some one really capable of hurtin' ya' meets up with ya'. Ya' have ta go sneakin' in when I'm gone... (btw, do you have plans for that dress ya' stole? hmmm, that's more kowaii than Yuryoku-sama when she's "angered".)
AND ya' toasted my keyboard! Shame really, warrenties don't cover "toasted by would-be-tiara". Glad i still have my lap-top.
I just feel sorry for Hotohori-sama, his sake being publicly show ta be inferior to a good Irish beer. How could ya' do that to 'im? After he let ya' stay in his palace, gave ya' a room ta sleep in, dinner, and enough sake to drown his entire army, you insult 'im, and take MY sake and beer over his! (Hotohori-sama, I would't stand for that and neither should you.)
I am glad that you and Chichiri are even now. I think that was a very good revenge, though I will be a bit more painful with mine... Heh, bet ya' enjoy that sort of thing. Can you say "sadomasochism"? A big word, I know. Chiriko? ::hugs kawaii little Chiriko:: Can ya' get Tasuki a dictionary? He needs one. Thank ya' Chiriko! ::hugs Chiriko and grins:: Here ya' go Flamed-ass.
And of course it is tha same Glastig. While Glaistig might be closer to pronunciation, (say it with me now, pro-nun-ci-a-tion) The first "i' does not belong, take it from the fae that knows. And leave that vicious little rumor about my legs out of this! ::moons Tasuki:: SEE! I am entirely a woman. I am not a goat! Not one bit of me! Ya' KNOW how these things get twisted! So I live outdoors near a pool, what of it? They have to start callin' me a goat-woman? Likening me to Pan? Mock me?! I'm friggin' Irish, not Greek or Roman! GrecoRoman's were even more hentai than your droolig fans. I want nothing of them. And have you ever seen a goat in panties? Ya' really had ta ask that? Can ya' blame me for my drinkin' and violent tendancies? What is your excuse for it all?? All that i put up with, and i'm still nice to farmers and children. I still have a soft spot for the old (and by my standards, Chichiri would be getting pretty old now), I still tend to their cattle, despite all that I go through, all the redicule that I get, them sayin' that i'm a goat-woman, and ya' have to go breakin' inta my place and trashin' it?!!!!!!!!! I could shaggin' kill ya! KisssssssaMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Yuryoku na Miko:"I thought only Nuriko was a cross-dresser..." Oh damn. Yuryoku-sama, please tell me that's not why he stole my panties.
Yuryoku-sama:"Well, there are those pictures of him and Tamahome floating around the internet... oh wait, stop. Improper thought..."
Come to think of it, "Fan-boy" does sound kinda fruity...)
And don't call me preverse! I didn't go on a panty-raid! And my best friend is not the president of some droolin' fan club about me!! So who's more etchi really???
The Glastig
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Dear Blood Sucking Goat-Chick,
OI! I didn't steal yer friggin' dress an' yer beer sucks! I got some small cloth slingshots an' some kinda black disks that Chiriko sez go in the PC. OHHH!!! I just stuck one in an' you should be ashamed to have such hentai s--t in yer home!! I didn't know that Tamahome was doing THAT with anyone! Let alone Nakago! What kinda hentai goat babe are ya'?
So ya' showed me yer hooves, big deal! Ya' know ya' really need to shave. Or would ya' prefer me to just flame all that fur off?
Tasuki
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Dear Suzaku Seishi,
Okay boys, we have had a lot of fun and games in the Imperial Koukyuu recently, but let us calm it down a bit. I mean, it is great fun tormenting Tasuki and Chichiri -- but I have a Koukyuu to run here! I cannot have
"crazed hentai chicks" chasing you guys into the Palace. Next time I will order the guards to stop them most roughly! Which in my book is chopping their heads off!
The Empress Houki is still recovering from her illness and has to pay attention to the young Emperor -- and we all love to help her out, he is a lovely boy -- so like our late Lord. She is a sweet soul, but not the ruling sort. There is a lot of work to do rebuilding our country. So, no more strange women running after the Seishi through the Palace -- understand. That mess you call "chocolate" is terrible to get out of silken fabric and off of the furniture. Not to mention the guards they knocked about, who did not wish to hurt strange -- seemingly insane -- girls. Next time I will set the eunuchs on them ... they are MEAN!
However, I have had my revenge on the Blue Monk... Tasuki, just ask him about the Lady Owlet, and let me know what he says. From what I know, and boys I know everything that goes on in this Palace ... well, let us just say that the
Blue Monk cannot claim to be in mourning anymore. He has found an understanding ear and soft heart in the Lady Owlet. Oh, and Tasuki, the Lady Dumpling sends her love...
Behave yourselves!
Black Jade (A.K.A.) Hotohori no Chuuguu
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Dear Black Jade,
Thank you my lady, I knew I could always count on you to help Houki run Konan and care for Boushin. Please try to be gentle with Tasuki's "crazed hentai chicks", as I do not wish to see them harmed. As to what has transpired with both Chichiri and Tasuki, they wish to reply to your missive. Arigato, my most gracious Second Consort.
Hotohori
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Dear Black Jade,
The Lady Owlet, no da? Why we are just close friends, no da. What has she been telling you? If your "revenge" was what I think it was, then it was very "sweet" indeed Black Jade-sama, ne no da.
Chichiri
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Dear Black Jade,
So Lady Dumplin' sends her love does she? Yeah, well I'd like to send her a little somethin', too but you'd probably abuse me again!
Tasuki
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Dear Tamahome,
Hey Tamahome!!! I was reading some of your letter's. As soon as I saw that comment about you getting a Mr Hat, I fell off my chair and started rolling around on the floor laughing so hard I thought I was going to be sick! I agree, more people would write in to you if you made your answers at least a little funny or something like that. I know I would. Your most likely confused about "Mr Hat". You see there's this show that's real popular in our world called "South Park" and there's this teacher, who has this thing agenst (I know I spelled that wrong) gay people, but doesn't realize that he is gay, but anyway he's got a puppet called "Mr Hat" that always sits on his one of his hands (I think his right) but it's really funny! If you are curious about this show, I think you can find a page about it at Comedy Central.com (I'm not sure if thats right).
Kiwi^-^
P.S. You should really try that "Mr Hat" thing sometime
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Dear Kiwi,
Thank you for explaining South Park and letting me know I have about as much personality as Mitsukake (Gomen, Mitsukake...). Now I'll never hear the end of it from Gen-chan. He already thinks he was the hero of our adventures! Now he'll think he's Mr. Personality, too! What can I say, keeping up with Miaka is very draining! It drains one's energy from all that running around and saving her butt, and it certainly drains one's wallet feeding her! But hey, I love her, so I deal with it. At least I'm not out abusing Chichiri! Of course, I'm also not that stupid, either!
Tamahome
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Dear Tasuki,
You know what! (I'm going to regret saying this but..) I don't know if I'm the only who's noticed this, but I think you and Glastig would make a cute couple! violent but cute! If I hadn't known better, I'd say you've got some what of a crush on her! Really I'm not just saying this to get you ticked, I mean it. I could be wrong, still you or her just may not realize it. Tell Kouji to give her back her panties! Mabey you already have, but really why would want to hold on to them in the first place!..... unless my theory is true ^-^ !
Also tell Glastig to let Yuryoku na miko know, that I was not offended by her comment at all, and that when I brought it up with Tamahome I just wanted to see how he'd answer. and that I was never upset with her. so you be little messenger boy OK!
Miaka
P.S. If you do like her, you better make sure that she isn't what you read about, because sucking your blood vampire style may put a kink in the relationship.
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Dear Miaka,
Are you nuts?!? Me an' the Glastig? I don't think so! Anyways, Kouji took all the panties, he's soooo hentai! An' he refuses to give 'em back. I do have some nifty cloth slingshots, though. I'm not sure what the rest of the stuff is, but it's mine now!
Yuryoku na Miko was glad that ya' weren't offended. But now she wants to get me an' Glastig together over sake. You &*^%$#@ women are way too meddlesome! I ain't datin' no blood sucker an' that's that!
Tasuki
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Dear Chiriko,
Dear Chiriko I was wondering if you could have a look at this for me...
If 10= 6+ 4
then a= b + c where a=10, b=6 and c=4
Hence
a=b+c so
a-b=c
(a-b)(a-b)=c(a-b)
a^2-2ab+b^2=ac-bc
a^2-ab=ab-b^2+ac-bc
a^2-ab-ac=ba-b^2-bc
a(a-b-c)=b(a-b-c)
a=b
Therefore 10=6
This doesn't seem right......Can you answer that for me
Jeff
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Dear Jeff,
This was an amusing "proof", although I seemed to be the only one here that appreciated it. The part where the misdirection comes in is that we forget that a-b=c, and therefore a-b-c = 0! To resolve a(a-b-c) = b(a-b-c) would mean
dividing both sides by (a-b-c), and as you well know, you can't divide by 0!
Thanks for the brain teaser. Now go do the rest of your homework.
Chiriko
PS: Please tell your friend that I was amused to receive his solution about 30 seconds after I solved it myself. Also please tell him that he needs to have more faith in the Seishi. After all, math was my favorite subject!
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Dear Chichiri,
*dries her tears*
Don't you dare apologize, it's not your fault.... I just wish I had thought a bit more when I summoned you and had you grant my wishes.... I wanted to spare you any pain or embarassment like this.
*SIGHS*
Oh well hindsight is 20/20, or so they say.....
*takes his mask off and looks him in the eye*
You ok? You're not traumatized or anything are you?
A deeply concerned cause she's in love with him...
Wandering Mage Chichiri... (*why do I have to fall for the guys who'll never love me? *SIGHS*)
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Dear Wandering Mage Chichiri,
I am fine, no more chocolate mess and nice clean clothes, no da! Chichiri no Aijin feels better too now that Tasuki, as she put it "got his". It was painfully amusing to watch, no da. He tried to get her to hide him when he realized Aidou was here and she said yes, then shoved him out the door into Aidou's waiting arms, still saying it was all his fault, no da. Oh well, I am confused as to why she is upset with him, about my bathing alone, but I don't think I'll ask, ne no da. Poor Tasuki-kun, I hope his bruises heal soon, no da. Arigato again for everything!
DA and a hug!
Chichiri
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Dear Tasuki,
*log hits Tasuki in head*
Tasuki no BAKA!
How dare you do such a thing to a holy man!
Have you no shame!
*beats him repeatedly with logs and drags him home, so he can face all the female wrath of the family*
Aidou
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Dear Aidou,
Arigato! That was great! Next time you come by, please let me know ahead of time as there are people who would pay good money to see Tasuki get the snot kicked out of him by his sister. You're really good with those logs! I'm not sure Chichiri approved of all that violence, but I loved it!!
Arigato Gozeimasu!
Tamahome
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